Posts Tagged ‘Divorce Advice for Men’
Divorce Advice for Men
There are very few times in a man’s life that he will actually seek help or advice for his own need. There may be a plumbing job he doesn’t mind asking about but rarely will he ask for help with his feelings. Getting divorced is probably the only time he will and should get all the help he needs.
Having gone through the whole process myself and seen the light out of the other side I can tell you this much. It takes longer than you think it will to become emotionally stable following the break up of a marriage whereby you are the one who gets left for someone else. Its not that you find it hard to get over the fact that your ex wife is now with someone new. More the fact that your life has changed by so much that you may find it hard to get used to it.
The whole process of divorce for men is a long and sometimes tedious one, with lots of letters going backwards and forwards from your respective lawyers, when all the time you will be expected to still work well for your job, be a good father to your children and keep a roof over your head in time of massive upheaval.
These points I think may be of some help to anyone going through a divorce but particularly men, as divorce for men can be much harder on your emotional state than you would otherwise think.
1 Choose a lawyer on recommendation, if this is not possible interview three
2 Communicate with your lawyer exactly what you want them to do and what you do not want them to do on your behalf. They will assume that it will be up to them to do all of the mediating work on your behalf and at your expense.
3 Keep communication going with your wife. If this stops you will end up fighting about something you agree upon because your lawyers are fighting each other.
4 Draw up between you and your wife what you want and expect from the split and come to agreement over this. Otherwise you will be paying your lawyers to fight over a microwave. This will cost you much more than n new one.
5 Keep all correspondence.
6 Do not bad mouth your wife. Especially if you have children.
7 Do not get into any tit for tat situation. Meet up and calmly agree, back down if you have too.
8 Take up a new hobby or sport. A fitness plan may help you in two ways, one to vent steam and another to help you look your best for when you may wish to start dating again.
9 Lean on your family and friends, its vital you talk about how you feel and get out your frustration. They will understand and they will help you get better by just listening.
10 Remember if you have children. They come first and you will always be their Father and your wife will always be their Mother. Divorce for men is hard but you can get over it.
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Lee_Tidman
Divorce Advice for Men
Gender roles can be a factor in every setting, even in the court system. Divorce proceedings can be an example of this. But it is possible for men to overcome some of the stereotypes and ideas about the role of men in a divorce. Presenting an accurate representation of your role in your marriage and family life is crucial to being considered as a unique individual in your divorce proceedings.
No two couples get divorced for the exact same reasons, and no two divorce proceedings are the exact same. Because of this, it is important for both parties in the divorce to be accurately portrayed so that the court can help make the best decisions for both parties and their family. Often times, this can include defeating restrictive gender roles and truly considering both parties based on their complete family, emotional, and financial history.
One of the best ways for a man in a divorce to ensure that his side of the story is fully reflected is by hiring an experienced and thorough attorney. An experienced attorney is going to have the know-how to present their client as real person and not just a stereotype. This can be crucial in accounting for the unique details and situations surrounding your divorce. Whether you are seeking fair distribution of assets or fair consideration of your role as a parent, an experienced attorney can be a huge benefit to you.
Also, being transparent and honest about your goals and desires for your divorce will give your attorney a better chance of expressing those desires in a convincing manner to a judge or mediator. No two men are the same and no two divorces must be handled in the exact same manner.
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=James_Witherspoon